What good in the world can blogging do?

A lot of good. Maybe more GOOD than we can imagine. Why? Let me tell you how 7 teenage voices will change the world.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet the game changers.

"Getting our voices out there matters? How do we do that?  [yada, yada, blogging]  Will you teach us how to blog?"

That was pretty much the gist of the conversation I had with this group of kids after a talk I gave in April 2015. The topic was youth ingenuity. The attendees, almost all adults, mostly educators, social innovators and social sector folks just happened to include this small group of 15 and 16 year olds. My message to the group was that we can't afford for their voices to be unheard. Why? Because they will change the world.

I developed a class for these kiddos and began teaching it as a volunteer on June 22, 2015.

Today is July 13, 2015. I will meet these kids at 4:30 this afternoon for our 4th class. How did we get here and where are we going with this? It is quite simple. These youth, facing many unimaginable hardships, had the excitement and curiosity for life that young people innately have. They also had a chance meeting with an adult who they thought might have something to offer them. That adult was me and, like every other adult in the world, I know that it is my job - and my pleasure - to teach children what they want to know. There is so much talk and frustration about the state of education in our nation and world that we often fail to hear the beautiful stories of our young people excited to learn. So here is that story, the first installment of many to come.

"Finding My Voice"

Not only is today our fourth class, it is also the day a film team is coming to class to help tell our story. What began as a small volunteer experience for me is becoming a beautiful example of a need for our youth. The class isn't just about blogging, as writing a blog is merely a vehicle, a communication tool. The lessons I teach the kids go much deeper. These are kids who have very deep stories and experiences of the painful truths that exist for teenagers in America. They are urban teens of color with the struggles, safety concerns and challenges that exist in their reality, almost completely unknown, unheard and undervalued by the rest of the world. And I do mean the rest of the world. Just as we don't hear about and easily avoid tuning into the realities for children all across this planet.

In my class, the topics we delve into include truth, integrity, vulnerability, boundaries, personal safety online, creative self expression, self-confidence and so much more. In a class of 7 students, I have seven entirely different voices, expressing themselves in seven beautifully different ways.

While my work is largely focused on teaching entrepreneurship, 21st century and "soft" skills, workforce readiness, career planning and the like, success with all of these lessons - typically triggering social-emotional issues for young people - begins with helping students find their self-confidence. There is no better way that I have found in my 15 years in education than to help students find their voices while they learn about and prepare for the real world. So, I named the class "Finding My Voice". And wow, they are doing that in ways I could never have imagined.

So why are we filming our fourth weekly class? Because the class has become bigger and more significant than we originally thought. What was at first a small summertime course has become a vision for a six month class that not only guides these students through the social and personal experience of stepping into confidence and expression of their truth, it will inspire others as well. It will be a peer-to-peer mentoring training that allows these super seven kids to learn personal gifts and self-management that they can then coach and inspire the next group of 7 students through, inspiring healthier choices for themselves and others. When students witness their peers doing well and achieving, the results can be a mixed bag. Rather than ostracizing the one kid who is choosing to do better, this is a small group who are, together, doing GOOD. Peer pressure is less likely when the kids have each others' backs. And what's more, the experience of these seven kids is something other kids can look forward to having themselves in six months' time, with their own small group of peers.

How do we keep this going? We need to raise money. A crowd funding campaign will be forthcoming, complete with a video and an appeal from all of us to support a small group of youth whose voices will do a lot of good in the world - the kind of GOOD the world desperately needs right now.

This class will be a powerful, fun and beautiful example of personal growth, empowerment and self-expression. That the kids are not at all isolated from the world in this experience - this is quite deliberately the point, actually. A self awareness of their place in the world has already been born for these kids, rooted in compassion for the readers in similar situations all around the world. And their hearts are growing: they hope to inspire other young people in every corner of the world simply by being themselves, speaking their truths, and using the medium of blogging on the great social equalizer that is the Internet.

The kids and I want to know:

Have you spoken your truth today?
It might just change the world.

A lesson on never crossing the finish line...

My lesson for this moment: The work is never done. The goal is never achieved. The finish line is never crossed. This is because of the ever-expanding nature of our universe and our human experience. When I work on or work towards something, the work I have done to this point affects the nature of what I am doing. My work then expands and becomes something else, something new, something brighter, something bigger. As much as my deep desire in life is to be able to check things off a to do list, this is not the nature of life. Sure, we can complete small tasks and bucket list items but even those "items" we've completed have changed the nature of everything else in our life - everything about ourselves. And we are prismatic - even holographic - there are so many facets to each of us that can be changed and affected simultaneously by one tiny movement in life. Even our thoughts change things.

So, I am challenging my belief that I *should have* achieved something else or completed something in particular by now. When I stop and think about, with each step I have taken to build what I am building in life, I have significantly enhanced, strengthened, altered and expanded my work - and my life. It is ever growing. I cannot feel badly about not being "done" by now. Because there is no done. When my work is done, I am done. The nature of life allows me to feel that crossing one finish line was only a step in being prepared to cross the next finish line.  All these finish lines take us to the final finish line of a life well lived.  By that time, and only at that point, will I be done.  And when I'm done, when my work is done, I return home to the other side. And I'm far from ready for that.

Our tribe...

Some indigenous cultures have a tradition of embracing and loving the member of the tribe who causes harm, pain or suffering to others. This is an act of treating pain (the wrong doer acted from his own pain) with love. They tell him he is loved. That he is made of divine love and he belongs. He may fight back but eventually the love (which never tires) wins. The community does not give up the battle to reclaim his goodness, no matter how long it may take. To give up on that member of the tribe is to permit darkness to infect the tribe.

We are facing the same battle today in many corners of our lives. It may seem that there is more darkness now than ever but that is not true. There is more love and light now than ever before because of all the hard work done by the generations that have gone before us and the work we are doing today. We, the light bearers, have brought so much love to the world that our planet has shifted and darkness can no longer hide. What seems like an endless series of scandals and injustice and war is the darkness bubbling up to the surface and into the light so it can be healed. It's overwhelming at times but we can bring love to all of this darkness. We are having the conversations, making stands for peace and learning how to have compassion in new and powerful ways. We must not give up, even if it takes generations. 

We heal this world every day with our acts of compassion and as we do, that energy ripples through the world and heals people we will never know. We are the wings of the butterfly and the hurricane is love. 

Just as the tribe does not give up on the evil doing tribe member, we cannot give up on humanity. Keep up the good fight. We are winning. And we are healing the generations before and after us by changing the story of our ancestor's children and our children's ancestors.

Namaste.

A birthday and a lesson after death...

Yesterday was my friend Jonathan's birthday. I've known Jonathan since sixth grade. He was kind and funny and seemed immune to negativity, peer pressure, hatred or meanness. He was quite simply the kindest, most positive and upbeat person I knew. Jonathan and I lost touch as many of us Gen X'ers did (we didn't have anything like Facebook when we graduated - life was very different). One day, at some point after I found Facebook, Jonathan did too and we became Facebook friends. He would send me messages now and then (not posts on my wall but actual, personal messages that often just said "Hi Amy, how's life? I hope you're great. I'm very happy that things went well yesterday at the hospital. I'm so proud of my boy! He's going to play soccer soon!"). You see, Jon had all the reason in the world to be down-trodden. His five year old son had cancer. He and his wife did all they could to have a happy, normal life as they fought against the cancer monster and celebrated his son's little milestones in the big battle and eventual victory over cancer.

Jon died a year and a half ago, suddenly, unexpectedly. Jon shouldn't have died. There was no reason for it. He was young, he was proud of his time spent working out at the Y to be healthy, and he had a son who needed him arguably more than any boy possibly could. I attended Jon's funeral at home and reconnected with old friends. We relived the pure beauty that was Jon. We mourned, we became closer to each other and I met his wife Sheryl and his son as they were saying their goodbyes to my childhood friend.

Sheryl and I connected instantly. I wanted to do something to support her. But I felt that there was nothing I could do. I was wrong. And I am telling you this - if you are reading - because you, like me, probably need to believe in a much greater power than what you and I can comprehend. You need to know that God/the universe/an energy greater than us is always at work in our lives - just like I needed to believe.

Jon died in the fall, not long before Christmas. I felt so compelled to do something for his wife and son but I couldn't imagine what - I barely knew them and I had no idea how it would be received if I did something. I wound up shopping for Christmas gifts for them both - surely, I thought, that was acceptable and welcome. While shopping for a woman my age and a five year old boy I was utterly compelled to purchase a pink feather boa that I tried many times not to buy.  I thought it was too silly, too inappropriate, too - something. But I just went with my first instinct and wrapped it up and gave it to Sheryl for Christmas mere weeks after Jon died. When she opened the gift, she was speechless. She smacked my thigh, looked franticaly around the room and then got up, searching for something. When she came back and sat next to me, she stared at me in disbelief. She couldn't speak and I really wasn't sure what was going on. She had a pile of photographs and kept telling me she had to find one. She found it. It was a silly photo of Jon wearing a feather boa. It had become a joke the two of them shared and laughed about often. I knew instantly: I didn't give Sheryl that feather boa, Jon did. But he needed a human to be quiet enough and trusting enough of her instincts to help him give this gift to his wife who missed him so much so he could say to her "I'm here." ...And I was that human who was eventually quiet and compliant enough to take a pink boa off a wall, buy it, wrap it and give it to someone who would, unbenounced to me, know exactly who it was from.

Yesterday we remembered Jon's entrance into this world in a now-Facebook culture. Many of us posted long messages on his wall about how much we miss him, how his positive outlook continues to teach us and what a gift he was to everyone. And while Jon is "gone," he is often present in my heart and mind because he has been my teacher, both in life and in death. He gave me my first tangible experience of connecting directly with the other side, with God. I took an action that came from deep inside of me, one I could not rationalize or figure out, no matter how hard I tried. That deep instinct (Jon's urging me) persisted and I acted according to that instinct. It wasn't mine to judge, just mine to act upon for someone else's benefit. I believe that this is what we are all given every day: A strong urging to do something that we may not understand, that may not benefit us directly but something that we know comes from a place of love so we go ahead and do it anyway. And so tonight, I share this with you all to suggest that we can all hear the guidance of God and our guides if we just listen to that knowing voice inside of us which proves to always be right, even if we never receive the evidence of just how right it is.

Jon, thank you. I celebrate your birth into this world and the gifts you continue to give us. We all love and miss you and I pray that we will all continue to grow in ways we cannot yet imagine because I know you are there helping us whether we listen or not.

Happy birthday, sweet soul.

The Divine Cycle: Birth, death and rebirth...

Hey, humans!  We are surrounded by nature and nature offers us lessons whether we are paying attention or not.  Today, I was presented a humble lesson on birth and death (and darn if that doesn't somehow also have the sneaky little lesson of letting go attached to it!)

Birth and death are two perceptions of the same process. Everything - every animal, every plant, every minute, every relationship, every breath, every idea you have - everything experiences the two sides of this dichotomy in order to grow, change, and be present in this moment as it is intended to be.

Today it was my orchid that offered me the lesson - by both being born anew and dying in part at the same time. Since 2004, this beautiful plant has blossomed every winter. Today, it has at least six purple blooms waiting to be born. It also has a decaying, dying leaf. The plant is not unhealthy, it is simply putting its resources into being born anew, and not into keeping one very old leaf alive. We, too, must focus our energies on the parts of us that wish to grow, and be willing to simultaneously allow what is no longer necessary - or what must be given up - to wither and die. It is part of the natural order of things to live and die and be born anew. Don't spend all your energy on keeping something alive that is simply ready to go.

As you see the things around you - beliefs, ideas, relationships, perceptions, and purposes that once served you - now decaying in your life, rest assured that what is leaving you will create the space for the energy to be born anew in your life.  And what will be born anew will be full of the wisdom you've gained and the love you've found for yourself so what's coming will only be better than that of which you are letting go.

Namaste.

Death of a leaf empowers birth of budding new life.

If it's not love, let it go...

I've learned a lot lately about love and about the people with whom we play this grand "game of life."  It turns out we all want the same thing:  Love.  But we aren't all playing by the same rules - and we certainly are not all starting from the same level of skill.  I learned long ago (and I'm still learning) that not everyone has my best interest at heart and not everyone cares to.  If you're a soft love giving thing like me this can be a hard, hard lesson to learn...

Sometimes love really does just fall out of the sky;
let go of what isn't love and be ready  for it!

While some people do give and share their love selflessly, some take too much and devalue the love you give.  Some love disappears and some love just dies.  Some people cause harm in the name of "love."  Some demand your love in a way that suits them - but not you.  Some manipulate in the name of love.  Some just plain hurt you.  But I've learned lately that the time has come for us, the members of this beautiful human race, to love ourselves first and give love in real time only to those who deserve it.

We can (if we are so inclined) still love someone who takes too much by sending them love and compassion on the wings of a prayer - and giving that love we wanted to share back to ourselves. But there is no need and no reason to do anything that makes us feel anything less than wonderful inside.  In other words, there is never a good enough reason to give your love to someone who does not give you the same love in return.  The more we let go of those people whose "love" isn't really love, the more space we open for the kind of love we truly want to come rushing in.  ...But we need to be empowered enough to close that "not good love" door and believe in our right to do so before the next one (or two, or three) will open.

Bottom line, if it doesn't make you feel good, it's not love - at least not the kind that is meant for you. Whether it's a friend, your family members, a lover or an acquaintance  it's time to draw the line.  And it's time to demand, expect and allow only love which makes you feel as amazing as you truly are.  And yes, you are that amazing.  <3

Gifts from the universe: Re-examining during Mercury Retrograde...

Mercury is the planet which governs communication, technology  electronics, machinery.  It's a time when computers crash, communication with everyone goes haywire and plans go a muck   This gives us a great opportunity to slow down and focus on our own lives and what we may have missed in the months and years leading up to this time.  You will feel the need to tie up loose ends, speak your truth and handle relationships you have been avoiding.  Read more about Mercury Retrograde here and here.

Mercury Retrograde (November 6-26, 2012) gives us a chance (for about three weeks, three times each year) to go back and revisit the things we've left undone. Nothing complete will ever come back into your life.  The universe wants us to grow so anything that no longer teaches us will simply no longer be in our lives.  Whether memories, behaviors, relationships, questions, tasks left undone or just your way of seeing a situation, we have been given the gift of "re" seeing something in new light. Allow yourself to see anew, to adjust your thinking and feeling and see what you missed the first (or second, or third...) time around.

Rethink

Reflect

Revisit

Redo

Remember

Recalculate

Revise

Redesign

...These are the gifts of Mercury Retrograde

Image of planet in retrograde ("retracing" its own transit)
Source: http://starsyncs.blogspot.com/2010/12/mercury-retrograde-right-brain.html

Nothing comes back to you without good reason and a lesson for you to learn. Ask yourself what old things have come up for you - or come back to you - in the last three weeks. Whatever it may be, it is, at its core, an incredibly important opportunity to explore with new ideas because it is happening to you NOW. Reexamining the past and your attitudes about it is truly a gift because your soul wants to grow and learn lessons.  But don't get stuck with what has come up for you - you must make a choice about what you want to do with this thing, take the necessary actions and let it go. Remember not to hold on; to really let it go because it did not come back to you for you to repeat what you've already done. 

Each day is a new day and an opportunity to let go.  Each day is also a rebirth and an opportunity to see the world with new eyes.  Support yourself in learning both of these lessons during Mercury's retrograde transit.

Imagine just how powerful it can be to be given another chance to let go of something? Or even better - the opportunity to let go of the way you *thought* about that thing last time? Be sure you don't fall into a trap of repeating your own patterns, however, because you are never meant to go back and do the same thing the same way twice. You've changed and so has everything else. Use your current wisdom to revisit, heal, and let go.  ...And yes, be smart about those former flames that seem to magically resurface during Mercury Retrograde.  It's a well known phenomenon that this mystical window of time can bring back a former romantic partner with whom you still have something to heal.  If this has happened for you, re-read this because an old flame may be your trickiest "re" lesson to navigate.

The dark underbelly of "Black Friday"

I spent "Black Friday" far from any shopping center.  Instead, I spent it with a sister peace warrior in the battle to empower young people.  We spent our day talking about what we can do to help disadvantaged girls get ahead in a society which does not adequately prepare them to be successful in the world of work.  These girls have not been given the coaching and education they need and deserve to know just how to fight for themselves and navigate the rules to the game of life.  We dis-empower such young people by allowing the perpetual cycle of poverty to continue.  My friend and I do what we can and when we don't know what else to do, we look to others who do this good work to brainstorm with so we can come up with more ideas.

The irony of it it all is that I have chosen to stand up against the retail enslavement of people in my community and across the world today.  Yes, I said enslavement.  And yes, today is Black Friday.  Those who work for barely living wages do so because there is a feeder system (young people grow up without adequate workplace and career-planning training, in addition to the lack of programs that teach young people how to "unlearn" the habits and negative self-talk of poverty).  As long as my society demands the right to consume at dirt cheap prices, there will be companies who engage in low-wage employment practices, further perpetuating the cycle of poverty. There are those who fight against me right now as I take a stand on this issue but I know I'm not alone and I will stand up for what I believe until others stand up with me.  And you can start by (1) being conscious of how your shopping choices impact all the unseen people involved in bringing a product to you and (2) making any small change in your shopping choices.  Even just one.  Shop locally, support a local craftsman, make your own gifts, give to charity, sponsor children living in poverty, reduce your holiday spending budget or even just buy one less thing.  Any small action you take is one important step.

Source: https://www.facebook.com/brainsparker?fref=ts

2012 Black Friday: Enslavement of the low-wage American worker: 

Last night, before I went to bed, I checked Facebook and saw several posts by friends and many of my college-age former students posting about having to head to work at retail stores at midnight. They went because they need to keep their jobs and they need the money. Did they have a choice? No. And why not? Because our culture of CONSUMPTION has become one which now makes Black Friday not just an opportunity for retail stores to "kick off" the Christmas shopping season, but rather a requirement for us to consume, consume, consume. And who will make this possible for us? The low-wage workers who have no choice to work at these businesses, because when you live in poverty and you lack skills for higher paying jobs, you take and keep any job you can get.

Is it appropriate for any of us to ask someone to work a ten or twelve hour overnight shift they don't normally work when their bodies should be resting so that we Americans can purchase low-priced goods made in sweat shops across the world? No. And now we have become a society which has successfully established the enslavement of our own people (those working the low-wage jobs, of course) to fulfill our selfish desires to both make money (corporate retailers) and consume (citizens who have fallen victim to this ploy to get them to spend). This will not stop. Thanksgiving/Black Friday 2013 will be just as ridiculous - or worse. Retail workers will not be allowed to sleep through the night because their income hails from retail stores which now "have to" participate in order to compete in the profit game. Only WE can stop this. Ask yourself what truly matters and know that the sweatshops and enslavement of workers has finally come here, to our own community. It is as close as that cashier who took your credit card at 2:15AM so you could get that $55 flat screen television made by enslaved workers in China it's easy not to think about.

No one should have to drink Red Bull all night to make it through a ridiculous work shift their bodies are not already accustomed to. Ever. Especially mere hours after celebrating an American holiday which reminds us to "gives thanks" for what we already have.

My stance may shake people awake or it may anger them.  I struggle to censor myself anymore because I know the truth and I have to sleep at night knowing whether or not I took a stand and did whatever I could to make life a little bit better for those who need our help.  There are so many inequities and so many battles to be fought.  This is a challenge for a peaceful warrior who chooses always to see the love first but sometimes the love is the one thing at the heart of the shakedown which remains true.  As the following quote states, enlightenment is a destructive process.  We cannot awaken half-way and we can no longer pretend that the time has not come.  When everything is falling apart around us, it is the best sign I can imagine that it is time for us to destroy our own limiting and fearful beliefs too.

Source: https://www.facebook.com/truthBECKONS

10 truths: Picking up the pieces...

Ten truths worth telling:

1. That thing you really don't want to do is the one thing you really need to do.
2. All suffering ends.  You'll always pick up the pieces and build a stronger YOU in the aftermath.
3. Honor your impulses - if you don't, the energy builds up inside you and becomes something else you really don't want.
4. The time you spend in indecision changes the circumstances surrounding the things you must choose from.  You may have lost a very good thing by waiting to know if it was good enough to choose.
5. Real love never looks the way you thought it would.  Stop looking for it and starting feeling for it instead.
6. Don't allow someone else to choose for you.  They'll never be right.
7. When you don't feel good, put on your hottest jeans, your biggest earrings and pretend that you feel like a million bucks.  Even if no one else bears witness.
8. Dancing cures all ills, soothes all hearts, rids a mind of worry and translates emotional energy into joy, which is the fuel for the beautiful flow of life.
9. All joys and pains, friends and foes, triumphs and failures are meant to teach you something.  Pay attention - and love the painful moments as much as the blissful ones.  The greatest gifts lie in the darkest corners.
10. Falling in love is always worth it.  Always.  Don't tell yourself the old stories of heartbreak.  Heartbreak is only a memory.  Love is what is real, and it is waiting for you to open the door now.

A tree grows in the concrete.
It knows its odds of growing old are not great.
It cares not if its time is short,
rather it cares only to say "I'm here."
"This shadow is mine."
"I've earned what I've accomplished."
"I grew here to teach you a lesson, and
I'm happy to have had the opportunity to help you grow stronger."

3 ways to release, surrender, let go...

There's too much.  Too much of everything.  And for those of us who are sensitive, we are brimming over, swimming in the overwhelm and in need of release. I wish I had a manual for letting go, but I do not.  It seems that no matter how much I let go of, there's always more.  Some days it feels like a bottomless well... but something deep inside of me knows it is not.

We come here, to these lifetimes, to learn, to love, to lose and to let go.  We know we take nothing with us in the end yet we sure live like we do.  In fact, we take as much as we possibly can.  We hoard it - most of the time without even knowing.  We take all of the joys, all of the pains, all of the bliss and all of the sorrows.  Of course we want only the good things so we soak those up eagerly without cause for thought.  We adamantly reject and detest the bad things though because they feel so awful.  But in refusing and hating the bad, we make it grow bigger inside of us.  We focus so much energy on not wanting the pains of life that we sow such a fertile ground of Not Wanting Bad Stuff that we inadvertently attract more and more of it, over and over.  The law of attraction is real.  We really do get back from the world what we send out and when we are consumed with not wanting more of the bad (when we are neck-deep in the bad), that's all we're asking the universe for... and we get it.

This is where The Art of Letting Go comes in.  I should have a post-doctoral degree in this fine art by now.  I once purchased a book on Letting Go at a used book sale and treated it like my bible.  I carried it with me and read the analogies and thought about them over and over (red flag:  I was hoarding letting go).  I believed that the book Who Moved My Cheese was written for me and I had to own a copy after reading someone else's (yeah, there it is again...).  I needed to know *how* to let go and I wasn't going to stop until I figured it out (spoiler alert:  I don't claim to have figured it out, but I have donated most of my books and I have a few approaches I recommend trying).

Most of the time we know instinctively that we need to let go of things that no longer serve us (the knowing becomes clearer the more times we've faced the challenge of letting go - or, in some cases, when a close friend simply refuses to hear the story once more).  [So, Recommendation #1:  Get a good friend.  And be real honest with said good friend - ask for real honesty in return.  Buy good friend a drink and show up when good friend needs you to do the same.]

We need to let go so that we can focus on what we *do* want in our lives in place of the bad.  But those bad moments can be so insidious that they get stuck inside of us, refueling the automatic delivery system of exactly what we don't want any more of - so we get more bad, over and over, creating a seemingly bottomless well of hard, challenging, painful experiences.  Letting go of the thoughts, energies and (understandable) hatred of the negative stuff in our lives then becomes so challenging that it seems impossible to get out.  We feel as though we can't even remember what the good moments look like anymore.  The typical advice to "think positive" and focus on what we truly want becomes an irritating reminder that David is smaller than Goliath and he can't possibly win.  But what if the art of letting go happens in surrendering to the monster?  Can we love it enough to turn even our darkest moments and deepest worries into parts of ourselves that we can't help but love?

I believe so.

I believe that the brightness of love can shine its loving (and joyful) light precisely in the places we can't seem to escape.  By turning to face the monster and giving it love, we can shine our own light on the thing we want so desperately to let go of.  By loving that which we hate, we take away its power and we have nothing to avoid any longer.  The scary parts become the parts of us that are craving love and tenderness - something we have within us to give and feel much better than when we hate them.

Therefore, Recommendation #2:  Love the bad stuff, all of it, see it as part of yourself - a part that really needs a hug, to be held, to be told it's dream job is coming, it's beautiful and smart and has great hair... you get the point.

And because I'm a big fan of journaling - and writing in general, here's a third suggestion for your letting go journey, for good measure:

Recommendation #3:  Write a letter to God/your higher self/your guides/your angels/the person who hurt you/your future self/Santa Claus and tell him/her/it your deepest secrets, hopes, fears and desires.  Beg, plead, pray, bargain.  It doesn't matter what you say or how you say it, just that you are honest and that you are releasing some of the energy that is wrapped so tightly around what you need to let go of.  Then seal it up, burn it, hide it, shred it, bury it or read it back to yourself and hit delete.  It doesn't matter what you do with it because the message was delivered the moment you wrote it and acknowledged its existence   You've simply empowered your own ability to release (i.e. leg go) in the simplest of forms.  After all, it's all energy.  The fears, the hopes, the intentions, the messages in your letters, the worries you carry - all of it is just energy.  Release any small amount of that energy you no longer want and you will feel freer to start asking for and attracting what you do want.

I honor your strength, courage and determination in the battle of letting go.  ...And I have no idea who would own a necklace that says "let go" - not a clue.

Let's agree to disagree...

This may be the sharpest and most powerful tool in our toolbox but why don't we use it?  It's entirely possible to agree to disagree.  After all, we're smart enough to know by now that we can't change people, right?  And if we know that, certainly we can deduce from such logic that we can't change someone else's thinking by continually arguing with them, right?  But we don't follow this logic, as a rule.  We think if we fight harder, longer, nastier and in more hurtful ways, eventually we will win.  But when we do this, no one wins.

Is it a better outcome for you or for me or for society if no one wins?  No.  Because the collateral damage, the fighting, the pain, the wars, the manipulation... it hurts everyone.  And I do mean everyone.  Everywhere.

Today is election day in the United States.  It is an apropos time for me to pick up my metaphorical blogging pen once again (after an eight month hiatus) to say a few things about my favorite topics (love, peace and fairness) in relation to this day of great dichotomies.  We are choosing between two extreme choices today - and extreme choices are usually (if not always) polarizing.  Today in particular, we are choosing between...

Fear or excitement about the outcome of the election
Left or right political leanings
Democrat or Republican
Obama or Romney
Fair ballots or corruption
To vote for or vote against
Right or wrong
Fight or give up

....It all seems like too much - and it is.  And it has cost us so much.  Dead trees from all those glossy full-color political mailers...  Voice mail messages we don't want to listen to...  Billions of dollars spent on political advertising while the number of people living in poverty in this country and around the world has grown higher and higher...  And in some cases, it has cost people friendships because love can be lost when two people who otherwise don't interact politically for years suddenly realize they are on opposite sides of a very personal-*feeling* fence.  But it's not as personal as we think.  That's the problem.

We may care about an issue and we may choose to put our energy, focus, voice and money behind it, but we don't *own* the issue.  It does not belong to us.  Not to you, or me, or anyone, no matter how personally we feel we are connected to the issue.  Issues are just that.  They are issues.  They are the stories and discussions and arguments and laws and lawsuits and books and quotes and emotions that have been collected around a thing that we give power to.  Some issues - and the momentum of change they have created - have served us well.  Some issues have built great leaders and given us gifts of freedom, liberty, humanity, equality, movements, change and insight.  Other issues have given us agita, stress, anxiety, worry, fear, hatred, war and death.  But no issue is worth fighting to the death for.  None.  Ever.  Think like Gandhi in relationship to your issue.  In relationship to all issues.   Stand up for it, yes.  Speak up for it, yes.  Make it your reason for breathing if you must but do not turn to hatred or fighting.  Start a movement, motivate others, educate people.  But do not fight.  Fighting only begets more fighting, more fear, more hatred, more war, more death.

And there is something we can do now to end the fighting over issues, over politics.  We can't expect to see a less partisan government, that is clear.  But we can become less partisan ourselves.  We can choose to have conversation and healthy discussion that we can learn from.  We can agree to disagree and put humanity and our respect for each other ahead of "winning."  Because, after all, when one side "wins" in these terrible dichotomies, no one wins, least of all you and me.  Let's lead by example.  Let's show our "leaders" how it's done.

Yes, No, and Cancer...

It all comes down to balance.  But why is the illusive perfect in-between so hard to capture - and hold on to?

Harmony.  Balance.  Peace.

I've seen over and over again a commonality among so many women I know:  An inability to say no that is accompanied by an inability to say yes - for herself.

What is often said:

"Sure, I can do that for you.... and no, I don't need any help."

That's fine if it balanced with an equal amount of:

"No, I'm not able to help with that right now... and I need help with something."

Why the imbalance?  Because, too often, the people who are asked to help are those who are reliable, extremely giving (whether asked or not) and almost exclusively willing to sacrifice themselves for the needs of someone else.  And once others know who the "yes" people are in their lives, they develop a comfort level which can and often does turn into a form of dependency.  This, in turn, creates a new dynamic that becomes very difficult to break free from - one that makes both the giver and taker believe that this is the "norm" of their relationship.  This is a terribly imbalanced relationship and also a form of codependency.

There can be healthy codependency for periods of time but the overall and long-term picture of a relationship between any two people must have a healthy balance of give and take.  For instance, two people diagnosed with the same disease who find one another at a support group can become equally dependent on each other for support and understanding.  As long as this need does not become one which excludes the support (through the giving and taking of a reciprocal relationship) with others, this can be healthy and mutually beneficial.

This reciprocity of relationships in our lives has been at the front of my mind this week for several reasons.  It is indeed something I am still trying to perfect and embody in my own life.  I was reminded of my own tendencies to give too much and ask for too little help after I spent a recent evening with a friend battling cancer.  Her extremely loving, protective, generous nature has made her a giver for her entire lifetime yet now, at a time of great need when even her children are telling her to say no more often, I wonder if she is asking for all she needs.  I, too, know just how hard it is to ask.  There are so many reasons why a confident, strong, independent women tend not to ask for help.  But isn't it that same self-confidence that can give her the strength to ask for help when she needs it?  Easier or not, receiving help will help her to gain her strong sense of balance, critical for a healthy, balanced life.

I know that developing a strong balance of giving and receiving supports a person's equilibrium on a physical level, an emotional level, a mental level and even an energetic level.  As within, so without.  It's my belief then that it is our responsibility to teach our children how to develop, maintain and share their own inner sense of balance throughout life.  Quite simply, balance gives us a foundation from which to build the stamina and the sense of inner peace necessary to foster healthier lives, relationships, boundaries and perhaps even healthier bodies.

In my work, I taught my students about developing a work-life balance and reciprocal relationships in the workplace.  I think it's time I take that a step further.  We need a lot more yes-no balance in the world - and a hell of lot less cancer.

The famous speech... MLK still speaks...

Have you seen it?  

Have you learned from it?  

Have you been absorbed by it?  

Have you made choices in your life to live by it? 

I've been to Selma, Alabama.  I've stood at the church.  I've traveled the fateful road that saw so many march for what they knew to be their true and God-given rights.  And, I've seen the segregation so obvious to the eye and heart which still exists in this place where the movement began.

"This situation can and will be changed."

- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Watch it. 

Listen to his voice. 

Feel it in your heart.  

Live the truth.  

Know this speech and it's important moment that opened a door of change in our collective human history.

Today is not just a day off from school.  

It is a day to reflect and see how much has and has not changed since 1963.

The Speech that woke humanity... Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Let freedom ring!

On Divine Law...

Our story is never ending.  

The outcomes are not predestined, rather the opportunities and challenges that come up along the way.  

How we handle what we face is up to us and determines where we go next.  

Because the story never ends we must remember to always do what is best for ourselves and others because we are all part of the same divine energy governed by the Divine Law that says... 

*that which we send out to the world through thought, action or intent will indeed return to the place it came from... us*.

Divine Law, meaning that which is fair, loving and created for our highest interest, was created by Divinity and Divinity is the God energy that loves, protects and teaches us all as we learn that we are all indeed One. 

My journey is never ending and I choose to carry and embody love and right action for my companions along the way.

I embrace and I live by Divine Law.

I embrace and live by the Law of Love.

It's a new day...

It's a new dawn.  It's a new year.  It's a new beginning.  It's a leap year!

I've always loved the New Year.  Sure, I've loved the celebrations, the toasts, the kisses, the parties (yup, I did Times Square when at midnight a ball dropped and Prince's 1999 played everywhere) and I've even loved a New Years Eve or two alone for serious introspection.  Since I was a kid I loved the idea of celebrating a new beginning, entering a new day and a new year during the darkness of night and I love New Year's Eve fireworks so much more than those on the Fourth of July.  I find the cold winter night to be a time when we humans would only venture out into the night because something REALLY big is happening.

Last night, I felt that something really big did happen.  Something way bigger even than roaming the streets of Times Square and dancing to "1999" in the wee hours of 1999.

I don't know what it is, I won't pretend to predict anything but I do know that the shift I've been feeling, the one that has been aligning inside of me, shifted in a rather profound way today when I awoke - and I'm excited to see what comes with it along the way.

I'm a big fan of love, light, positivity, prayer, intention... of giving what you can and taking care of your own heart so I'm carrying these things with me into 2012.  I encourage you all to follow me into your own loving light in 2012.  We will need it.  We will surely need reminders to look for our own light and we may need to rely on each other's light more than we're prepared to but know that this is precisely the reason we will carry it forward.  The world - and you, and me - we all need the light and the love to help heal our species and bring love and divine intention back to planet Earth.  Our big beautiful temporary home needs us to love her and love each other just as she does by giving us absolutely everything we need to exist here.  If we can learn to love a little more (and this means loving ourselves more too), then we can surely start that ripple effect that we all know changes the balance of things in the world, heals all things and courses through the veins of each and every one of us.

May you be inspired enough to live your dreams.
May you have the courage enough to be unblocked from your own destiny.
May you have the strength enough to face any obstacle.
May you carry the light you were given by God through even the darkest days.
May you give love to one more person than you thought possible.
May you heal your spirit, strengthen your body and be who you are uniquely meant to be in the world.

Most of all,
May nothing hold you back.

And if you aren't sure you're ready for the big shift or the big energy coming our way, just take this tiny little test.  Just one question, that's all.

Q:  Did you let go of something in 2011 - a relationship, a job, a habit, a toxic situation, a bad friend, a bias, an unneeded possession, a false belief, a denial, a story that no longer defined you, an obsession, a fear?

If you answered YES to any part of this question, then congratulations, you're with us.
If you answered NO, I'm afraid you've landed on the wrong blog.

Happy 2012, ya'll!

The gifts of Christmas...

It seems that if someone about my age is a single and childless adult at Christmas, said single childless adult must scrape together some semblance of holiday-ness in order to feel worthy of celebrating a holiday that is pretty much designed for children.  I have noooo problem with this as I love children. I am lucky to have several in my life (a few nearby though most live 2000 - 7000 miles away).  I love them, I celebrate them and I enjoy seeing the joy brought to them by the gifts, the lights, the magic and the general air of celebration.  I love it.  And perhaps that's why I've really struggled with the tinge of sadness I seem to have had lingering deep in my gut for years when it comes to this holiday.

I loved Christmas as a kid.  We didn't have much so it wasn't about the gifts, it was about the pure fact that we had something positive to celebrate:  the birth of a baby who started a fresh new life (which curiously seemed to end a mere 3-4 months later when we celebrated that baby's death by wearing spring dresses in the cold Northeast with matching hats and white shoes we had to try reeeeal hard not to get muddy).  But Christmastime, amidst the snow, cold temps and moon-lit nights seemed magical.  It was a happy time (and lots of people who weren't, as a general rule, happy the rest of the year seemed happier in December).  It was a time when "old" people seemed to look me in the eye and speak to me like I actually mattered.  It was a time when my daydreams got lost in the late afternoon darkness that was broken up by various sizes and colors of Christmas lights on the neighbors houses.  Christmastime was my time for daydreaming, singing, painting and making things for people who were happy to receive them.  I got lost in the wonder of laying beneath the Christmas tree and looking up into the depth of lights and branches and ornaments, creating entire worlds of mystical fairy tales complete with little beings who I just *knew* lived inside the branches of my tree.  (They probably lived inside yours too, did you ever look?)

But as I grew up and tried hard to hang onto that wonder (which manifested itself as entire Christmas wonderlands complete with live 6-foot trees in one corner or another of the various shoddily furnished apartments I occupied at the age of 21... and 22... and 23).  I collected entire Rubbermaid bins full of decorations - some handed down, some collected at after-Christmas clearance sales, some purchased with money that was probably meant for food - but I just kept collecting.  I kept up the Big Deal Christmas thing for years, through different apartments, different boyfriends of different faiths, and different cities.  I had great parties attended by great bunches of friends who had great bunches of fun.  Somehow, I was still gifting Christmas to my own child within - and to as many friends as I could have come over.

But something happened.  I'm not exactly sure when or how - perhaps a bad relationship, or no desire to unearth the Rubbermaids, maybe I was too busy in my new job... whatever the reasons, it all led to years of little or no Christmas.  As friends had babies, my Christmas seemed a little out of place, so I gave it up.  I had children around me to give to so I focused on buying the sweet little gifts, wrapping them in curly ribbon, fancy boxes you don't throw away and custom-made tags worthy of hanging on the tree.  I loved this - I still do - but I realized that this was a replacement for the Christmas I loved so much as a child and gave to myself for many years as a young adult but for some reason stopped giving to myself in recent years - until I realized something very important.

It turns out that the gift of Christmas is something you CAN give yourself.  You CAN lay beneath the tree and stare up through the branches for an hour in a state of wonder at the age of 30 or 50 or 80 (mind you, I haven't hit two of those benchmarks yet so I'm speculating a bit here...).  You really can.  You don't have to have a child to do it and you don't need to justify it to anyone.  The gifts of Christmas are gifts you give to those you love, yes, but the real gift of Christmas is something much deeper.  It's not just about the meaning that is discussed, debated, debunked, disregarded and just generally dissed more often than not lately.  Rather it is very personal meaning that matters - it's the magical one that existed in your own childhood and that is not debatable.  Nor is the deep meaning of the holiday that we each hold deep within ourselves debatable.  But I won't tell you what that meaning is - that's not up to me.  

It's up to you - not your mother, your sister, your neighbor, the talking heads on TV, the marketers at Macy's, your friends on Facebook, the people you don't really like on Facebook or your ex-boyfriend.  If it's overly commercial to you, well, I kinda think that sucks but that's your Christmas, not mine.  If it's orthodox, that's your choice too.  If it's full of Santa or ornaments handed down for four generations on your mother's side or if it's a time to bake with your sister, that's entirely YOURS to have, to experience and to love.  Don't give it up.  Don't give it away.  Do give.  And do receive the gift of Christmas that exists deep within your own heart... that wonder you once had that still lives within you and wants to give itself back to you year after year and remind you of something only you are supposed to know.  It wants to give Christmas back to you as the best gift you can ever receive, so be open and receive it.

Merry Christmas to you, to me, and to all of us, in whatever way we choose to receive that gift.

Oh, and don't forget the gift of the guitar playing Santa...  This one is for you, T.L.

The un-shared ideas of quiet souls...

I've realized, over a recent period of self-directed disconnection from most of the stimulus happening in our world that so many people matter whose names we will never know and and so many solutions to problems in our world exist that will never be brought to light.  These inspired ideas and peaceful solutions won't even be brought to a level of consciousness other than that of the mind that thought it.

I've realized that our thinking, hurting, angry, over-communicative, over-stimulated and frustrated minds are so full that the quiet space needed for the gentle souls among us and peaceful solutions contained within them have nearly no place in our world right now... but it is precisely those souls and those ideas that are so needed.

The news bombards us.  The talking heads talk.  The angry politicians act without thought and fight without concern.  The egos are bigger than ever.  Acting on impulse, from anger and without thought - it's everywhere.  The injustice is ripe and rotting in our own front lawns but we can't seem to clean it up.  We can't seem to even call attention to it anymore because it is everywhere.  In fact, the stories that seem to capture and hold our attention are those rare stories of change and hope in the world - those are the ones that stand out from the rest.  Those are the stories we are truly seeking, but our pre-programmed and muddled minds always seek more and more stimulation and ultimately they forget the story of hope.  They turn back to the terror, the fear, the desolate reality of a world gone wrong.  We swim in it.  We are desperate for change and peace but we can't find it.  Too much gets in the way five minutes later.  The hope which seemed so palatable is once again gone and we are left seeking, knowing it is somewhere in the chaos of the rotten injustice.

The hope must be held on to.

Those of us with the hope, the ideas, the solutions, the programs, the generous hearts... we must dig deep and find all the courage we can possibly find to speak aloud those truths which we know can change the tides in our world.  It's hard, doing such a thing, because it requires strength and courage that come from a place which requires a loving fuel to keep us going... but such loving, hopeful energy is so hard to find right now.  Yet still we must try.

And keep trying because that's why we are here.

Just remember that when all of the noise and chaos around us becomes deafening, it is in that space that we can be heard.  We carry the story of hope so many are seeking - and the courage to do the work.  There will be times when we - when you - will need to be your own fuel.  When attentions wander and people forget that your ideas, your courage, your work of change are indeed valuable and are indeed changing the world, you must become your own fuel.  It was in the very same space of great pain and injustice in the world that the quiet and humble teachers throughout human history - Jesus, Gandhi, Buddha - walked quietly through the hells that surrounded them to tell their stories of Love, Peace and Hope.  Those teachers became leaders, those leaders became prophets and those prophets became spirits who guide us still today.  Call on them in your time of great need, but remember that you too contain the same courage they had.  You have the same kind of thoughts, the same space for hope, the same earthly body and the same calling to "be the change you wish to see in the world." (Gandhi)

You may be one of us, you may be that peaceful teacher and I tell you now that I  hear you... and you are not alone.  For it is in the time of great imbalance that true balance can be found.  It is in our destitution that we can so clearly see what hope looks like.  And it is in a world that appears devoid of love for our fellow human that we can recognize instantly what love looks like.  While many may become distracted and forget that they've seen the love, somewhere deep inside them their soul remembers what it looks like and they will keep seeking it.  Stand firm in the love and peace you bring to the world and those seeking it will find you.  God's plan is greater than any of ours and he has sent us to remind the world of that.

Be strong.  Be faithful.  Be courage itself.  Be what you were meant to be.

Eye of God

Farewell wishes to Jonathan... & Finding comfort in cyberspace.

Tonight I learned of the passing of a gentle soul who gave much more than he ever took from this world.

Jonathan	live life to the fullest everyday is a challenge. one day at a time. things do get better.

A friend of mine named Jonathan passed away sometime between his excited post at 9:33am yesterday about the upcoming football game and today when word broke across the great span of Facebook that he was gone.  Learning of Jonathan's passing, and sharing sorrows with so many old high school friends would seem far more inappropriate were it not for this same medium bringing Jonathan's positivity to us on a near daily basis.

Jonathan was kind, humble and full of love and light.  I do not say these words offhandedly or because I lack for words when speaking of someone who has passed away.  This man was truly a gentle soul.  I remember him befriending everyone, reaching out to everyone and smiling at everyone - during a time (high school) and at a school that was, in all fairness, particularly unkind to many.  Jonathan was one of the few who rose above and simply didn't see the painful social boundaries that caused me and so many others so much pain and anxiety.  Jonathan was always unapologetically himself.  Always.

When Jonathan and I reconnected on Facebook, he became the breath of fresh air in my news feed.  Amidst the occasional vulgarity of my high school students, the self-aggrandizing photos and status updates and political declarations, Jonathan's posts were short, simple and hopeful.  He and his family faced much - much more than most of us will ever face ( I honor and respect their privacy by not being direct here) but he never lost hope; he never ceased to be upbeat and full of love.

For Jonathan to pass in his mid-thirties is shocking to those of us in his generation.  For Jonathan to leave behind a loving partner and sweet son is unhearable to think about.  But for Jonathan to be missing as the constant reminder that even a sunny day is something to post about is a moment for us all to stop and see what truly matters in life.

My friend Jonathan...

Loved his son more than words
Supported his loved ones through the greatest challenges people ever face
Spoke simply of simple things that bought him joy
Remained positive through the darkest of dark days
Appreciated all that life gave him no matter how small the deed or seemingly insignificant the moment
... and always reminded me to appreciate what I have and be present in every single moment.

Jonathan, you were and are an angel among men.  You touched my heart and you linger in my soul as a guide and mentor for life.  May we always, always remember to honor your spirit through the kind and simple ways we bring joy into another's life whether it is ever noticed or not.

Rest among the angels, my friend.  We are all celebrating you on Facebook, just as you graced us there.  And as Rob said in his post on your page, "You will be missed more than your humble and giving soul could have ever imagined."

99: another way to say "Global Awakening"...

It's quite simple.  When the PEOPLE begin to recognize their own power, they begin to wake up.  When the people - the collective that is the human population - starts to stand up and fight for itself, this is evidence of a global awakening.  99 has become an easy slogan for us all to recognize and understand as the place where WE fit.  "99" has become the term for the Great Human Awakening.

These are amazing times we are living in.  I am one with the 19 year old Rastafarian at Occupy Wall Street just as I am one with the young, scared little girl in Taiwan trying to work harder in a sweatshop and not be punished. I am one with the slave boy in the waters off Ghana and I am one with the filmmaker trying to capture the story to tell the world.  I am one with everyone else - all 99% of us.  What I am not one with is the greed and the corruption held in that remaining 1% - the 1% that for countless years has oppressed, enslaved, stolen, abused and focused on only itself.

I do believe that the individuals behind that 1% are souls with a purpose just like the remaining 99% - and their purpose is being delivered to us right now.  We are now awakened, we are now standing up and we will  never, ever go back to the way it was.

No one knows what will tomorrow will bring but can you FEEL the collective global awakening happening?  There's simply no way that we will ever go back to sleep.  There's no way that the occupiers will give up, go home, or cease to care.  This is not a headline we will stop reading about because this time, the headline is about US.  The greatest element of design in our human condition is the next generation:  there is always another generation with boundless hope for a better world that will carry on in this journey of awakening on planet Earth and we will continue to move toward it until we achieve it.

We *are* the collective soul on this planet.  We are changing our own world.  We ARE choosing freedom, equality, compassion and love.  We are doing it.  Right now.  We are realizing how much dormant power exists in the love and concern that lies in the hearts of 99% of the human population - enough to realize that we need to fix just one percent of us.  Just 1%.  It will happen.  Have faith.

Welcome to your awakening.

With love,
Amy, 99

The words of a dead man...

Tonight, I am sodden in this.  I, too, am a human.  I, too, feel the unjust in what has just happened.  When will we stop killing?  For EVERY reason.

Below is a letter from Troy Anthony Davis, his body now dead and his soul returned to its source.  His work in this lifetime brought us to this pivotal point in the growth of the Collective Soul of Humanity.  When will it stop?

To All:

I want to thank all of you for your efforts and dedication to Human Rights and Human Kindness, in the past year I have experienced such emotion, joy, sadness and never ending faith. It is because of all of you that I am alive today, as I look at my sister Martina I am marveled by the love she has for me and of course I worry about her and her health, but as she tells me she is the eldest and she will not back down from this fight to save my life and prove to the world that I am innocent of this terrible crime.

As I look at my mail from across the globe, from places I have never ever dreamed I would know about and people speaking languages and expressing cultures and religions I could only hope to one day see first hand. I am humbled by the emotion that fills my heart with overwhelming, overflowing Joy. I can’t even explain the insurgence of emotion I feel when I try to express the strength I draw from you all, it compounds my faith and it shows me yet again that this is not a case about the death penalty, this is not a case about Troy Davis, this is a case about Justice and the Human Spirit to see Justice prevail.

I cannot answer all of your letters but I do read them all, I cannot see you all but I can imagine your faces, I cannot hear you speak but your letters take me to the far reaches of the world, I cannot touch you physically but I feel your warmth everyday I exist.

So Thank you and remember I am in a place where execution can only destroy your physical form but because of my faith in God, my family and all of you I have been spiritually free for some time and no matter what happens in the days, weeks to come, this Movement to end the death penalty, to seek true justice, to expose a system that fails to protect the innocent must be accelerated. There are so many more Troy Davis’. This fight to end the death penalty is not won or lost through me but through our strength to move forward and save every innocent person in captivity around the globe. We need to dismantle this Unjust system city by city, state by state and country by country.

I can’t wait to Stand with you, no matter if that is in physical or spiritual form, I will one day be announcing,

“I AM TROY DAVIS, and I AM FREE!”

Never Stop Fighting for Justice and We will Win!