Keep praying, keep praying....

None of it has gone away.  None of it has gotten better.  None of us are immune.

Japan, Haiti, Gaddafi, Eman Al-Obeidy, Lebanon, war, famine, fear, pain and inequity - it is all over the world.  It's all still happening.  As you struggle with your own pain, fear and disappointments, remember at least for this moment that there are millions and millions of us living in horror and desperation.

Please don't forget.  But please don't dwell in the sadness.  There is power in our emotions.  Our job, if we have the strength (and every single one of us should have at least that), is to send love and hope and prayer to all who suffer in the world and to do what we can to end suffering in any way possible.  Whatever it may be.  Wherever it may be.  We are all one and we grow closer every day.  We are closer to the Japanese than we were one month ago when the earthquake hit, even if we have forgotten amidst the busyness of our daily lives.

Keep praying.  Keep giving.  Keep loving.

The moment before serendipity happens...

What does it look like?  

What does it sound like?  

Does the world get brighter?  

Do your ears buzz a little bit?  

Do you get hints?

I'm left asking myself all of these questions today.  Serendipity happened last night.  Divine intervention happened last night.  I was sent to a place to meet a person I'd never met who was sent to give me some very important information.

Where and what don't matter here.  But because I am human - and you are too, and because humans are curious and need context for a story to take root, I'll give you a bit of the story.  I will tell you though that what I am truly in awe of is how and why it happened as it did.

Yesterday afternoon's much awaited sun beckoned me to go for a drive - a drive which took me to one of my favorite places on the planet.  I wound up at my friend Corey Tevan's art studio - a lovely, imaginative human being who, when I'm in his presence, always brings me a sense of love and magic - and who opens a part of me I didn't realize needed opening.  Upon entering his gallery, he poured me a glass of wine and we began to talk.

I thought nothing and everything of the things of which we spoke - our conversations are always esoteric and like a dance without choreography but with a rhythm all their own.  This was mentioned, that was mentioned.  A person I'd never heard of was mentioned - and as such, I thought nothing of it.

My friend Corey Tevan and his art.

That person I'd never heard of and who my friend mentioned off-handedly, just happened to be the person I was meant to meet last night.  I drove an hour to have a poignant and incredibly serendipitous conversation with someone I never knew existed.  Someone who, most significantly, had no reason to show up unexpected as he did.  In fact, he had reason not to appear on this day and time as he did.  The list of evidence that shows that we were meant to meet is astounding - and terribly personal so I'm going to have to leave it at that for now.  But this person I'd never met is a messenger and a man of God - and he had a very important message for me - a message I had been seeking with great intent in recent weeks.

So you can imagine that I'm now asking myself what happened - what existed in the moments leading up to this providence that I can recount?  Is there something palpable in that space that I can use to be more aware of an impending kismet moment in the future?  Or is serendipity so magical precisely because we never know when it is going to happen?  Or can there be both?

Thinking back on my drive North, my mind was full of questions and my body was full of emotion.  I felt as though I was shedding something I no longer needed - but in order to do that, I needed it to all bubble to the surface.  Every song on the radio spoke to me.  The ride seemed both longer and shorter than usual.  My mind was elsewhere - I don't know where it was but it was not freely open to the unknown as it might have otherwise been on a random afternoon drive.  It was processing something and I now think that it was processing and working through things that needed to be brought to a level of consciousness as I grew closer and closer to my fateful encounter.

Somewhere between my divine thought of "Hey, it's so nice out today, let's go for a drive" and the moment my answer arrived in the form of Reverend Joe in his big black coat... somewhere in that divinely choreographed afternoon was a moment of "before" my serendipity and I am beyond curious to find it and recognize it for future use.   I am wise enough, though, to know that the mysteries of the universe are far greater than my linear, organizing mind is capable of understanding, so I am comfortable with the the reality that I may never be able to satisfy my curiosity.  But there's something to be said for being aware of the wonder that comes from a glimpse of divine magic when it happens.  It is that which I revel in at this moment.

My messenger, Rev. Joe.

Balance is being captain of your own ship...

Without even typing a word, this kind of feels like a redux on the theme of setting boundaries I wrote about not too long ago.  Perhaps I'm being reminded of my declaration to setting boundaries as I am called to write about balance tonight.

Perhaps it's because I've lost some very precious things in life, perhaps it's because of some wisdom I've gained with age, but whatever the reason, I've reached a point in my life where I know that I must intentionally and deliberately create balance in my life.

So many speak of balance.  So many books are written on the subject.  So many experts claim to have "secrets" or tools or or to-do lists for us to use in creating balance in our lives.  I'm beginning to think of balance a little bit in the way some might consider God:  worth believing in, worth the effort to know, a life-long inquiry and entirely unknowable by anyone but oneself.   And just like many a believer's prayers to God, I think one's commitment to maintaining balance might ebb and flow throughout life as well.  Finding balance becomes terribly important when life is out of balance but not much of a task when things feel good (how many people pray more when things go really badly in life but forget to check in with prayers of gratitude when life seems to be going along swimmingly?).  And just because life feels good, doesn't mean things are in balance.

Balance?

I'm in a space right now where things are beginning to feel pretty good.  I've eliminated many unnecessary things from my life in recent months.  I've spent quite a bit of time in reflection, meditation and prayer.  I've been asking myself the Big Questions.  This is all good.  But in the process of getting rid and opening up, I am acutely aware (surprisingly!) that a lot is flowing to me right now and I have to be very careful not to recreate another version of what I've just gotten rid of.  I am employing my still juvenile boundary setting skills, but in the midst of drawing lines and saying yes or no, I find myself reflecting on the need to be acutely aware of not just what I'm allowing into my life but how I am using it and relating to it.  Am I being realistic?  Am I being overzealous?  Am I missing information?  Is this going to serve me?  How much of my precious energy and focus do I want to assign to each part of my Universe of Amy?

This process is new to me and quite fascinating.  It feels as though I have just given myself permission to take the wheel and decide what, where, how, who and when.  If this is the case, who the hell was in charge before now??  Is this really what it feels like to be grown up?  That's a laughable thing for me to say because despite a number of revisits to my 26th birthday over the last several years, I am indeed grown up and I have the battle scars, bits of broken heart and a few grey hairs to prove it.  I've also been "grown up" for longer than most people my age but I think I've been seeking the permission and direction of others in one way or another for almost all of my adult life.  And since that is also precisely what I did during my childhood, I guess this means that up until the very recent past, I have lived my entire life according to the expectations of others.  Good lord.  Is this possible?  And am I the only one?

So, here I am.  At a very interesting transition point in life reflecting on so many lessons learned in order to apply them to achieving balance.  Perhaps this revelation itself is part of creating the balance I am seeking.  Perhaps being worthy of my own permission - and recognizing that no one but me can give me permission - is creating the foundation for that balance.  I don't know what it is for sure and I can't tell you what it looks like but I can tell you that this balance thing feels like something big.

My heart expands when I consider being the captain of my own ship and deciding what kind of cargo I'll carry with me to which ports.  And if need be, I can decide to dump it all into the ocean to lighten my load or recalculate my direction to a new port.  It's not about what or how much or how long or how far, it's about my relationship to what I carry -- and remembering that I get to choose what I say yes or no to when it comes to what I bring on board in the first place.  I'll get back to you when I can figure out how to factor the wind, waves, gulf stream and tropical storms into my New Balance Theory.  I'm wise enough to know you can't plan for those things and they are what really throw us off balance in life in the first place.  For now, I'll start here and keep up with my prayers of gratitude.

(Part 2) Peace is always the answer...

This is Part 2 of a two-party entry I began this morning.  There was much, much more to say.

My belief (click to read the previous post) is this:  War is never the answer... Peace is.  I have countless reasons why I believe this but only a few thoughts were shared in my previous post.  The reality of saying things out loud (or writing them out loud, as the case may be) opens me to other's opinions.  I love that about humanity.  I also love that I live in a free society where I am free to believe in Peace.  Specifically, as it turns out, the freedom of Peace.

Peace does not cost anything - and even someone living without freedom can embrace, embody and spread Peace.  Consider what Nelson Mandela has achieved through Peace, as a prisoner for 27 years of his life.

“If you want to make peace with your enemy, you have to work 
with your enemy. Then he becomes your partner.”

- Nelson Mandela

Peace is made of love and when love is given, it multiplies, it heals and it is returned ten fold.  Peace is harmonious with our most basic emotional needs and the way we would treat a newborn baby or a child.  Peace is the only way to end suffering in the world even if you see the issue as a simple matter of physics.  Yes, physics.  While I am a very spiritual person, science supports what I am about to explain about Peace.

Every action has an equal and opposite reaction (Einstein - another Peacemaker speaking of a "universal truth", if you will) and matter will not change on its own unless external conditions such as temperature, or internal conditions such as chemical content, are changed.  And a tiny, simple, almost imperceptible change can completely alter something from one form to another, like combining 2 Hydrogen atoms (H2) with one oxygen atom (O2) makes an entirely different compound every human needs for survival:  H20, or water.

We also need oxygen but, like hydrogen, when it is combined with other elements, entirely different and often deadly substances are created that are nothing at all like water. So, now that I have used almost all of my high school chemistry on you, you can begin to see why I will argue that bringing more Peace to the world has the potential to change things significantly simply by introducing it somewhere where it does not currently exist, if you only look at it from a scientific perspective.

If we go one step further and consider that quantum mechanics has shown us that things happen beyond our scientific method's ability to measure, then we can be even more open to the unknown impact of Peace on a world full of suffering.  And consider, for a moment, a mind-blowing discovery within quantum mechanics called Young's Double Slit experiment that illustrates how the act of observing a thing changes it (this fascinating discovery is also called Relational Quantum Mechanics).  If even passive observation can change the behavior of particles then I implore you to consider how prayer and intention for Peace by millions and millions of people can, indeed, change the world.

"Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding"

- Albert Einstein

Here's a video illustrating Thomas Young's Double Slit experiment - worth the watch.  But stick with me on this Peace business...

So, since I am not a scientist (though I did love my high school physics class!), and because I do believe in the great power of the mystical and metaphysical, I will implore you further to consider just how powerful Peace has been on this planet and will continue to be.

The most famous peacemakers in history are household names - Jesus, Buddha, Mother Theresa, Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, The Dalai Lama, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.  Yes, the greatest terrorists and murders in history are also household names but it is because of the pain and suffering they have caused, not the love they brought to the world.  When you hear the name Hitler, you instantly feel the impact of that name.  The fear, the violence, the unconscionable destruction of human life on a massive scale.  You heart sinks.  You sigh. Your shoulders drop or your muscles may tighten.  You would prefer not to have heard or read the name at all.  It is a name with a low, sinking, painful feeling.

But go back to the list of names I wrote in blue and read those again.  Pause on each one.  You gaze may rise, your face may relax, you may take a cleansing breath, you feel stronger, more hopeful, you might smile.  You might even nod or breathe audibly at the recognition of  a powerfully loving, giving, compassionate human being.  You may see pictures of each in your mind - Mother Theresa holding a dying child, Jesus healing the sick.  You may hear "I have a dream" in Martin Luther King's own voice in your head.  You may feel the sacrifice Gandhi made of his own body.  And all of these names together, emit Peace.  A strong and sturdy Peace that each has left here on Earth for us in moments like this.

I was challenged by a friend today on my statement that war is never the answer.  My friend challenged me not on the issue of Peace but on my insistence of "Never."  My friend argued that had we not gone to war against Hitler, he and the Third Reich would have succeeded with the extermination of the Jews.  As Gadhafi is now killing his own people, is war not a possible solution to allow his people to be free?  My friend doesn't like war either but argued that opting for peace and hoping for the best outcome, while desirable, is not preferable to war when there are instances that seem to have no other solution.  I understand this, but I still take a different view.

I respect my friend for making this statement as it planted the seed of what you are reading right now.  What I said in response was this:   Stopping Hitler was one thing, the world war that surmounted was something else. I believe that we are advanced enough as a human race to learn from thousands of years of war and death and destruction that war is never the answer. I think that something could have stopped Hitler years and years before he grew a following. Turning a blind eye was as much of the fertilizer for the Third Reich as Hitler himself was. And I still think that we are at a point in human history where we risk greater damage to the world and humanity than ever before if we do not find ways beyond war to address all of these issues that are arising and will continue to arise around the planet. My belief is that every Hitler, every Gadhafi, rises to power as a challenge to all of humanity to find a New Way to combat hatred. In order to find that new way, we must look outside the war "box" and see what else we have in us to employ. If we just keep turning to war, we'll never find that something else. Nothing changes if we keep doing the same thing over and over. So in order to turn hate to love, we must employ more love, more peace - and it is going to take ALL of us to do this.

Suffering around the planet is our opportunity to engage in the act of Ending Suffering.  After thousands and thousands of years, we have evolved as a human race to a global community with responsibility to each other just as we are responsible to our family, our neighbors and our nation.  There are no borders, there are no lines.  There is no difference between you and me and someone we've never met 7,000 miles away.  Our task as a human race is not to wage war, not to have more [money/food/possessions/power] than others, not to pretend it doesn't matter because it's happening to someone else born somewhere else.  You could have just as easily been born into the body of a suffering orphan in Africa.  And so could I.  Because we are now all connected, we must feel empathy.  And once you do, even for just a moment, you will also feel the innate need to replace the feeling of suffering (Hitler) with compassion (Mother Theresa).  Hatred with love.  War with Peace.

We were not born with a single cell in our tiny bodies that knew of hatred or violence or war.  These are man-made things.  We were born only with cells knowing of the need for food, human touch and love.  Think of the number of times a day a baby smiles or giggles.  The number of times a child laughs in a given day in comparison to an adult.  It is not until we achieve adulthood that we begin to incorporate fear, pain, suffering, abuse, trauma, neglect into the psyches of others.  And yes, we do it to others, just as others did it to us.  That baby was not born knowing these things - the world in which he grows up exposes him to it.  And therein lies the problem:  The cycle of suffering from one generation to the next by being born into a world that solves problems with fear, not love.

We must now solve the problems we face with love in order to end the cycle.  The time has come and we each have everything within us we need to become ambassadors for Peace on this planet.  And if you can begin to live your own Peace and then send it out to the rest of the world, imagine the power it might contain.  I won't try to convince you that I know it to be true (and I do), but the power of Peace, when spoken, when shared, when employed as a habit in your daily life, feels just as loving and powerful as the names of Ghandi, of Jesus, of the Dalai Lama, when they are spoken.  Those humans are not in the same room with you, nor are some even some even alive on this planet, but the mere mention or thought of their names can be uplifting.  That is the very same universal positive power that exists in prayers of Peace, conversations about Peace, and Peaceful action in your daily life.

And, just like love, when given, Peace comes back to you tenfold.  So bring Peace to your life today and see what happens. Choose to not engage in road rage tomorrow even if you are late for work and someone cuts you off (while it is not about what you get in return, pay attention to what begins happening around you - you might find that someone else lets you cut in front of them in traffic - or a parking spot opens up just as you need it).  Look for an opportunity to give something small to someone else - let someone go ahead of you in line at the grocery store, or give a dollar to a beggar and look him in the eye and smile while you do.

Perhaps, just like the electron in the video above which acted differently once it was aware it was being watched, we too can affect different behavior all over the world by becoming aware that everyone is watching us.  You're watching what I'm doing right now, who is watching you and how might knowing that someone is watching you change your behavior?  If you think about it for a moment, you'll find yet one more reason to act in Peace because whether you think you are being watched or not, the universal laws that govern our world will bring us more of that which we give.  So give Peace.  Today and every day.

“As I have said, the first thing is to be honest with yourself. 

You can never have an impact on society if you have not changed yourself... 

Great peacemakers are all people of integrity, of honesty, but humility.” 

- Nelson Mandela

Heal the World, Make It a Better Place...

It's no surprise to anyone who knows me that I know that Michael Jackson sang about the kind of truth in the world that we are experiencing today.  I also know that we can Heal the World, we can Make It a Better Place.  And we must.

I'm so struck today by this unconscionable disaster in Japan.  Many of us are left with images today that shock us and beg the question, "what can I do?"  Or better yet, "what should I be doing?"  I'm typically not a fan of shoulding someone but in this case, I believe that it is our obligation as humans to do something.  And we can do something just as easily as we we breathe, think and enjoy the pleasures that exist just by being here on this big beautiful planet.

While so many are suffering on Earth today, I feel that I have to do something.

I can't go rescue people in Japan.  I can't put out fires.  I can't find lost loved ones or deliver water to people trapped in their homes.  I can't figure out how to secure nuclear reactors or put highways back together.  I can't tell a mother that her child is gone or a child that her mother is gone.  Someone else, somewhere, will do what I cannot do but that does not remove responsibility from me or anyone else.

So I will do what I can, where I can and how I can.  What I can do is feel good that I've been giving my time and passion to a volunteer cause helps young girls I've never met.  That today I gave my time and knowledge to a friend who is growing into a role much bigger than himself.  That tomorrow I will give my birthday to a cause that is dear to my heart.  And I will give my time and joy to my mother over the next few days.  I will also recycle, call my friends, see a newborn and commit to praying more for peace in the world.

I fear that some people have developed a sense of numbness, a sense of helplessness or surrender in the face of the extreme pain, loss and anguish we have seen so much of lately.  It's true that it feels like it is almost too much for a single heart to bear.  I fear that some people have given so much to the last disaster that happened - or to the one before it - that they feel they have been exhausted.  That they've "given enough" - or even worse, that they've "given too much."

We must all continue to give and to give every single day.  Not just when Katrina hits.  Not just when Haiti is in ruins.  Not just when there is upheaval or celebration over a toppled regime.  Not just when you can turn on the TV and be reminded of your responsibility to give.  Just like life, where we must continue to celebrate on all the days between the holidays, we must also give on all the days in between.  We must learn to give when everything seems well in the world, in our community or in our own home.  We must give every single day.  In any way we can.  We must say hello to a stranger.  Ask the clerk at the grocery store about his day and really listen to what he has to say.  We must acknowledge a homeless woman and remind her that she is just as important, or intelligent, or worthy as you or me.  Let's not look away from someone in a wheelchair.  Let's ask a restaurant owner why he is using Styrofoam and then ask him politely not to.  Offer someone a ride.  Offer your skills to a friend.  Start donating to a cause that can do what you cannot.  Be more loving toward someone who rubs you the wrong way.  Call your estranged father.

Let's stop drawing lines.  Let's start building bridges between us.   But more than anything, let's start giving something - anything-  to someone today.  We are all victims of Katrina, Darfur, Haiti, and Japan just as much as we are the hero who pulls bodies from the wreckage or the one who fixes the highways.  What none of us should ever be is indifferent because what happens to everyone else happens to us as well.

They are us, and we are them.  

I am you, and you are me.  

We are one.  

And we can all heal the world.  

...For the children, and the children's children.

We are all affected by one person's pain...

Today I pray for miracles, faith, hope, 
compassion, cooperation and peace 

in the aftermath of the earthquake in Japan.


We are all one.

So many lives were ripped apart by the unthinkable earthquake in Japan today.  We are all connected, we are all affected and we are becoming a humanity that finally feels one another's pain and anguish.  This and all natural disasters happening around the world cause us all pain.


I hope you pray today, send your love and remember that we are all connected. We are all one.  Take care of each other today, we all need one another.  Your prayers, thoughts and good intentions are powerful for you and every other human on the planet.