Time with Mom... and making her proud.

There is not a blog site with enough of space nor a book with enough pages to allow anyone, ever, to write everything there is to be written about the complex and holographic relationship between a mother and daughter.  I'm not even going to attempt anything of the sort.  Instead, here's what I have to say (starting with a concise list of twenty items)...

In five day's time, my mother has:

1. Celebrated the return of my 26th birthday (again).
2. Reminded me and informed several others that she spent two days of hard labor "bringing me into this world."
3. Watched me speak from the heart to a room full of people.
4. Met people who love me.
5. Met people I love.
6. Met some of my friends who are now her friends on Facebook.
7. Stayed up until 4:00AM, on purpose.
8. Made me cookies.
9. Conspired to marry me off.
10. Burned cupcakes.
11. Bought me $3.00 gourmet cupcakes.
12. Ate sushi for the first time.
13. Decided she doesn't like sushi and has no use for chopsticks.
14. Made a commitment to a monthly donation to my favorite cause.
15. Meditated with a group of women she'd never met ...and me.
16. Did not learn how to upload photos on her new laptop despite hours of my coaching.
17. Spent too much time on Facebook.
18. Made me laugh.
19. Frustrated me.
20. Made me wish she lived closer.

She'd have to make her own list of things I've done since she's been here but I'm pretty sure her list would be just as ridiculous.  And I know that she would add one thing, and it is this:

I've made her proud.  

She tells me that a lot these days.  She would be the first to tell you that she should have told me this a lot more during the first 20 years of my life.  But she and I have learned a lot and come to appreciate the fact that our greatest challenges with each other - in this most sticky relationship - are exactly the challenges we both needed to go through and overcome to become who we are today.

Somewhere along the way in life, I learned that motherly love can come from anyone.  I tell my students that they've made me proud because everyone needs positive reinforcement and the kind of love that comes from hearing these words.  I know I do.  And I think we should all affirm one another often as we can.  We should all say "You've made me proud" more often than we do.  This is not necessarily just a mother's job, of course, but I think many people assume that others get this kind of reinforcement at home and that's enough - but it's not.  And what's worse, we don't think it's necessary to commend one another.  Far too many people do not have mothers, fathers, partners, families, colleagues or bosses in their lives who can give them this kind of gift.  But you can.

There's a great deal of love, gratitude, power and magic in telling someone that they have made you proud.  So go ahead and tell someone that he or she has made you proud.   Today.

Thanks Mom.  You've made me proud.  ;-)